Idiot Savant Online

John Lichman's third attempt at a personal blog and online savanting idiotic.

The Down and Out of D.C. Metro Vs. Proper

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It’s easy to say you grew up in Washington, D.C. It connotes you served time in a city that used to be rough, despite being the central hub of power for the United States. Maybe you lived in the posh Northwest, venturing every so often into Adams Morgan for a night of drunken debauchery and running from panhandlers to catch the last train at midnight. Maybe you were from Northeast, not as nice but filled with charm and proof you were probably working for the government. Or maybe you lived in Southeast/Southwest You probably didn’t, but let’s move on.

If you want to be sure the person you’re talking to grew up inside the 4×4 confines of actual D.C., there’s a simple thing to ask: “Proper or Metro?”

It’s like being wrapped with Wonder Woman’s lasso, injected with sodium pentathol and having your mother stare you down to six inches all rolled into a three-word question. If they hesitate for even a second, the person is a Metro DC native. This isn’t to say they’re not from D.C., but they’re not from inside the District. They likely grew up in the suburbs of Virginia (Alexandria, Arlington, Reston) or Maryland (Bethesda, Silver Spring, Waldorf). A true resident of the District can say without hesitation, “Proper.”

It’s easy to confuse and mislead folks when you say you’re opening soon in D.C. For example, the Alamo Drafthouse, a theater chain mainly based around Texas and known for their eclectic screenings, announced they’re opening a new theater in D.C.*!

*DC meaning McLean, VA!

Per the press release:

One Loudoun Holdings, LLC, a joint venture of Miller and Smith and NORTH AMERICA SEKISUI HOUSE, LLC (NASH) and its retail development partner, Potomac Development Group, LLC, announce today that Alamo Drafthouse Cinema will open a new location at One Loudoun in Loudoun County, Virginia. The 34,000 square foot Alamo Drafthouse Cinema will be the first in the Washington, DC market area. Construction will commence in spring 2012 with a projected opening in spring 2013.

That’s fantastic news, except for the tiny white lie about “the first in Washington, DC market area.” The Alamo Drafthouse has a spot just a half hour from Loudoun in Winchester, VA. This is, of course, splitting hairs about location and the Metro/Proper terminology when there’s no way to get to the Wincester spot by car. At the very least, folks in NOVA can finally say “Loudoun Proper or Metro” to us DC ex-pats when we shamefully enter their theater.


Written by john lichman

January 16, 2012 at 12:02 pm

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